Arnel and Cecilia, this couple is like family to me (Ceci). Notice we have the same name? That’s because we do. My mom and Cecilia were college best friends and stayed close ever since. My mom named me after her strong and feisty friend Cecilia, and I like the name so it worked out. We stayed with the Ticsays while visiting Denver, CO. They welcomed us to stay in their house because the temps were real cold at the time. We also ate really well while staying with them, Cecilia is an amazing and healthy cook!
So, a little bit about the couple number 4: Arnel works for the Outdoor Channel, and Cecilia is a nutritional expert, and trainer for Revelation Wellness. They have three grown up boys, and two grandchildren.
With 27 years of marriage in their “tool box” we had a lot to talk about with them!
As they shared stories, seasons, and lessons while standing in their kitchen, one could sense the mound of shared memoires, good and hard, that their marital foundation is based on.
When I meet a couple that has this many years invested into one human (see Meet the Dolands), I picture their marriage like a book that is still being written. The point where they are at, 27 years in, looks beautiful, unified, and established, but there are so many pages before their current one that contributed to their strength, length, and character.
Some of The Ticsay’s story includes an immense amount of moving, due to Arnel’s job. They’ve moved and lived what feels like everywhere, from an outsiders perspective. From San Diego to Tennessee, to Texas to Colorado. They’ve experienced a variety of weather, culture, and terrain. With all that transition, along with their three boys, comes the natural challenges that could bring a couple closer or push them away from each other. On top of the transitions, Cecilia battled breast cancer in 2001. “Cancer opened my eyes that having balance is more important. It also made me realize how little control we each have in & on our lives. It’s God who controls it all.”
There were a couple of key themes that stood out to Kyle and I in our conversation with them:
- Unconditional love
- Unconditional love, Kyle and I tried to identify this thing, this concept. Is it an action, a state of mind, or a perspective? Either way it’s definitely a CHOICE. When you throw two people under one roof who have quirks, flaws, and habbits you’re going to need a lot of un conditional love! You feel me? There are no pre requisites, expectations, ifs, ands, or buts, to unconditional love. It just loves without a “because.” It doesn’t need a reason. Raise your hand if sometimes that’s hard, (raising hand). The one thing unconditional love does require is for the one showing it, to have grace.
- The perspective of forever
- It sounds pretty obvious, that the vows stand for better or for worse, for richer and for poorer, through sickness and health. However, it seems that in our culture marriage is approached with some form of exit plan, whether that be conscious or sub conscious. The Ticsay’s have been through both sickness and health, but their perspective of forever when they said their vows have carried them through. “Perspective’s”, starts in your mind, you control your mind, so what is your perspective?
Getting a glimpse into Arnel and Cecila’s marriage was a privilege. We feel very honored when couples open up with us about the things they’ve learned and still are learning in their marriage adventure.
I want to end this blog post with, if you’re married look at your spouse and remember the day you said your vows.
Remember where you were and how you felt.
Hold each others hands, repeat your vows.
This time it’s different, you have more shared memoires built together. Even if you’ve only been married a month, you’ve grown.